We could’ve come up with some half-hearted bullshit…but then again…that just wouldn’t cut it. So rather than posting up some random as story sharked from someone else, we just thought we’d give you some insight into what’s actually going on.

Rather than telling you who we are, we’re going to stick with the old Jekyll and Hyde story.

My friend, Jekyll (cause he’s the nicer one of the two) and me, Hyde (cause I’m supposedly the ‘cunt’ one), finished high school a few weeks ago. We are now off to start University, which most say is the best part of one’s life. I don’t think that’ll be the case with the two of us. You see, he’s off to do Engineering in some Ivy league Uni and I’m in Medicine down under in Australia. Exactly..thats what we thought.

We kinda started this whole AHR thingo as a sort of a joke. It wasn’t meant to be famous or get us paid or anything, but just as a joke. Hoping that we could someday get somewhere with this, but at the moment, this seems unlikely. The thing is, neither of us has a lot of time to put up our usual bullshit, and neither of us wants to make it a personal blog-where we rant on about our sad..sad lives. Haha. No..but seriously.

So this is sort of an apology to the very few sick, twisted, perverted people with cognitive impairment who actually enjoyed reading our stuff. We never really knew you, nor did you never really know us…but I guess there was some sorta ‘love’ between us right? Na..we didnt think so either. But hey..this is what goodbyes are all about. The usual mushy wushy stuff.

Enough of that. So yeah, we might not be able to continue this..or we might. Who knows. We’ve had a good run.

Love,

AHR

Yes..the high tops.

Sort of like these Puma First Rounds.

Comfy-Yes. Supportive-Yes. Elegant-Perhaps Not. Gangsta-More So. They didn’t have the finesse of a tailored Armani suit, but they got the job done. Primarily used for basketball I suppose, they sort of changed into less chunky and more fashionable shoes during the start of the year.

And soon following suit were the even more ‘trimmed down’ versions of these, the Kanye West LV’s.

Much more slimmer than the original sneakers, they were at that time the most sought after accessory in every fashion junkie’s arsenal. But sure enough, like all things Kanye, this too died down.

Then came the mighty and awe-inspiring era of the Plimsoll.

Available in various designs and colours (from checked plaid to the ever useful grey), with the faithful Plimsoll one could never wrong. Elegant beyond belief, these started to take over the later half of 2009, fuelled by their ubiquitous presence in European fashion houses and at the infallable TopMan.com.

One might think that these beauties might never fade away, but one would be wrong. Such is life, and suddenly with the onset of the new decade-the Plimsoll has been shat upon by the retro legend of the: Boat Shoe.

Pure and Simple: Legend

These bring forth the inner sea-faring buccaneer within all of us. It truly does. Standing on the deck of your latest 60 meter catamaran, the salty ocean air blowing through your open Hawaiian shirt. It completes you.

It seems to have some sort of unkempt and ruffian sort of look about it. But that might just be the most appealing part. The shear ‘uncaring’ aura about it is the basis of the Boat Shoe’s magnetism. Oh everybody can buy pointy shoes, but do you have the balls to wear these outside in public and not give a fuck? Thats what this is all about: a mind game.

We prefer a rather lighter, possible like the beige above, felt colour to truly add inches to your genitals (figuratively…not literally). The Plimsoll’s reign of terror is finally over…

Filed under: Fashion ]]> http://ahrinfinity.wordpress.com/2010/02/07/obsolete-shoes/feed/ 0 AHR ! http://ahrinfinity.wordpress.com/2010/01/27/avatar-3d-kills-a-guy/ http://ahrinfinity.wordpress.com/2010/01/27/avatar-3d-kills-a-guy/#comments Wed, 27 Jan 2010 11:33:42 +0000 AHR http://ahrinfinity.wordpress.com/?p=615 ]]> A short conversation between director James Cameron and Peter Jackson.

Jackson: So James, how is Avatar doing?

Cameron: It’s going quite well…

Jackson: You know, District 9 actually got nominated for a Golden Globe.

Cameron: Yeah? Well my movie killed a guy.

Jackson: *starts to weep*

If you have not seen Avatar, go see it.

Right now.

It has to be, the best looking movie, ever. Once you snuggle up in your movie seat at the theatres…and put your 3D glasses on…till when the credits start to roll. One and only one word would come to mind: Amazing. The movie looks absolutely, and truly amazing.

But apart from all the credits and accolades it has recieved, of Golden Globes, provoking civil unrest, inducing suicidal thoughts…this movie probabily is the only one that can boast a rather weird sort of award: of killing a guy.

According to AFP: a 42-year old Taiwanese cinema goer, named Kuo, who has a history of high blood pressure…suffered a stroke while watching the film in the northern city of Hsinchu.

3D entertainment to the next level.

He was taken to hospital unconscious, where a scan revealed “his brain was haemorrhaging”. He died 11 days later. Emergency room Doctor Peng Chin-chih reported: “It’s likely that the over-excitement from watching the movie triggered his symptoms.”

The China Times reported that the incident represented “the first death linked to watching James Cameron’s science-fiction epic”.

(Cameron, left, and actor Sam Worthington, right)

This would definitely be the icing on the cake for Cameron’s legendary movie by this rather legendary achievement.

By now, you most probabily have heard, seen or read about the over sensationalized story of a 29-year old Indian male was “set ablaze by four unidentified attackers” in the Essendon suburb of Melbourne.

The victim was admitted to hospital and was later stated to be in a ‘non critical’ condition.

News Reports:

The gruesome attack on Jaspreet Singh in the early hours of Saturday took place a week after Nitin Garg, a 21-year-old Indian student, was fatally stabbed in Melbourne, provoking India to renew its warning to the Australian authorities to ensure the security of its students.

Singh was attacked in Essendon while he was parking his car in the northwestern part of Melbourne shortly before 2.00 a.m. He is said to be in a stable condition in Alfred Hospital with burns to 20 percent of his body.

Police were told that Singh had dropped his wife home and gone to park his car after a dinner party when he was attacked in Grice Crescent.

According to the police, as Singh was getting out of the car, four men attacked him, pushed him back against the vehicle and poured an unidentified fluid on him. One of the men then ignited the fluid with a lighter and all four attackers fled, The Age newspaper said.

The victim reportedly ran from the car while peeling off his clothes.

Racism You Say?

Well, in our humble opinion: This is fucking Bullshit!

The Truth: After investigation by the Federal Australian Police, reports have later emerged stating that Jaspreet Singh’s story just ‘didn’t add up’. Multiple statements were made in front of the media stating that Jaspreet Singh was trying to set fire to his own car in an insurance fraud but accidentally set himself alight.

Newspapers; The Australian and the Courier Mail, lead with a headline of “Indian’s Injuries Raises Questions” and have run with the line that “police are investigating all possible causes of the fire, including that Mr Singh lit the fire himself.” They also suggest that Police Commissioner Simon Overland would not speculate on whether Singh lit the fire himself.

Victoria Police were very quick to rule out racism and have already publicy stated that the case was very strange and unusual. They also appear to be concerned that they have been unable to locate clothes Mr Singh said that he tore off himself as he ran.

Icing on the Cake:

Figuratively speaking, the icing on the cake in this scenario was the immediate ‘flare up’ by Indian Politics. Most noticeably done External Affairs Minister S.M. Krishna, who went to the extent of questioning Australia’s capability as an educational destination.

What now, SM Krishna?

On a different note, would you really trust anything coming from the mouth of this guy after seeing the picture below….?

There have also been reports that due to these recent attacks, the security of the Australian Cricket players might be under threat. What the fuck kind of premise is that? 2 rather shady and psuedo-truthful cases and one that is obviously bullshit of racially motivated attacks..and you hand out threat’s to Australian nationals? Now that is just taking tit-for-tat too far. Its fucking borderline terrorism.

Now what wrong has Brett Lee done to deserve such treatment?

Maybe More?

This case may not be the only one. As the age old saying goes: there is no smoke without fire. The obvious outcome of this case might shed light to other such recent ‘racially motivated attacks’ against Indian students in Australia.

Well, that’s it from us…you be the judge.

But as for now..nothing better than how Brett Lee puts it: Bite Me!

By the end of 2008, it was estimated that there were about 4.1 billion mobile phones in the world. That meant that nearly 6 out of every 10 humans had a mobile handset.

Nearly all of these ‘mobile phones’ are manufactured by multinational electronic companies, like Nokia, Samsung and Apple. Not only mobile phones, they produce computers, laptops, telephones, printers, cameras and all other electronic devices.

What is common to each of these is that the companies, ever so subtly, leave their ‘logo’ on every product.

They surround us.

Then..for some reason…we felt like breaking the cycle.

Whichever phone you have, we can customize it.

With photos, text or logos.

Why not make your phone truly yours.

Leave your details below for individual pricing information.

This, by far, has to be the roughest shit I have seen in a long time. Rather than me trying to explain it, the official report from NDTV is as follows:

Caution: This post may contain profane language and graphic content

The News Report:

Help?

How sick do you have the be…really. A convoy of vehicles, who as stopped, calmly stare down at the guy who is missing his fucking legs!

The three men identified are District Collector (centre), Health Minister (far left) and Sports Minister (centre right). Surrounded by at least 20 other people; none of them, at all, even came close to help that injured cop.

These fat cunts would rather relaxingly sit back in their cars, than to offer help to a man bleeding to death.

Possible Solution: Some one should have kept a damn pot of curry next to the injured guy and these obese fuckheads would come running.

Was He Worst Saving?

You might be asking, that was that guy even worth saving? I mean, he was an Indian policeman. Characteristically, cops (or thullas) in the nation of India Do NOT have a Soul, have No Moral, Ethical or Social values whatsoever, feed off corruption and loopholes in the legal system, and usually aren’t even classified as human.

But still, though this might contradict the last line (it was said in sarcasm), as one individual to another, are they so fucking devoid of humanity that they refuse to even apporach a man dying in duty.

It makes me fucking sick to even think about it.

This honestly has to be one of my many reasons not to travel to India anytime soon.

The Footage

If you want to continue this article further, the original news reports and footage can be found on the following sites:

NDTV Footage

http://www.ndtv.com/news/videos/video_player.php?id=1191435

Cop’s Death: Minister refuses charge

http://www.ndtv.com/news/india/cops_death_minister_refutes_charge_of_insensitivity.php

After apathy, no remorse

http://www.ndtv.com/news/india/callous_ministers_show_no_remorse_stay_away_from_cops_last_rites.php

Warning: The following clip is the uncensored version of the original news reports, and contains graphic images. Not suitable for kids and those with a weak stomach.

Frank Mir, Former UFC Heavyweight, talks about psyche of a fighter before any match. Similar things can be seen with anything in life; be it a fight, a test or anything in between.

The aim here is to keep things in perspective. Focus on your goal, put it up against your strengths and weaknesses; and then work your way through it. Stay calm-Stay collected. Its a mind game…really.

What is it you ask? Nay, it is not Swine Influenza. And nay, it is not a ridiciously insane disease only found in the hidden jungles of Eastern Congo like the Ebola virus. It is not one of those weird personality altering disorders like Schizophernia, that make even the most docile person into a serial killer. Neither is one of the big boys like AIDS or Cancer which everyone is tryin to cure.
It is, infact, a little congenital disorder known as Progeria

What is This????

Not an Alien.

Not Photoshop.

Indeed. After looking at the image, the first thing that came to our minds is exactly as stated above. Contrary to popular belief, that is infact an 8 year old child.

What People Think….

Some people may say that we are being too harsh. So we went around to ask people what they thought of this. The following were top and most common responses from the general public.

“ there is no god…”

“this guy makes me question life”

“God with Photoshop?”

“The beady eyes…noooo!”

“looks like my grandpa on crack”

“THE F*CK IS THIS SH*T?”

“did your mother make love to an owl?”

And other things of this nature.

Progeria you say?

Hutchinson-Gilford Syndrome, more commonly known as Progeria, is an extremely rare and severe genetic condition wherein symptoms resembling rapid ageing are manifested at an early age. The disorder has a very low incidence and occurs in one per eight million live births.There is no known cure. Few people with progeria exceed 13 years of age. At least 90% of patients die from complications of atherosclerosis, such as heart attack or stroke. Mental development is not affected. The development of symptoms is comparable to aging at a rate eight to ten times faster than normal, although certain age-related conditions do not occur.

Birdman

What we have above us, is Tsimfuckis, or known to its “parents” as Justin Tsimbidis of Corona, NY. Becoming somewhat famous for posting rather silly videos of himself jumping around, the above is a response to all his viewers after people started to blatantly write abuses on his video’s as comments. Subsequently, he deleted his account and vanished, but has been later tracked on Myspace and Facebook. More can be read about him at Enclyopedia Dramatica: http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Birdman

Paa

Paa is a 2009 Indian movie directed by R. Balakrishnan starring Amitabh Bachchan, Abhishek Bachchan, and Vidya Balan. The film is based on the genetic condition Progeria and places emphasis on a father-son relationship. The film released on 4 December, worldwide.

This again seems to be a classic Bollywood scenario; theft of movie plots and ideas due to a definite lack of creativity from each and every person to appeal to the masses of a developing India. They say=Pure Genius. We say=Seriously Stupid. But credit goes to the production department of Paa for actually stealing ideas from ’3′ separate movies. Commendable!

Don’t watch this. It’s sad, depressing, clichéd and Amitabh Bachchan looks soo messed up. But if you do, you will surely find the storyline similar to the movies Jack, Mask and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

Hmmmm

This makes us think. Does Gandhi have Progeria?? Maybe Bollywood will make a move about it, when they’re done stealing plot ideas ofcourse.

He is known as the Mahatama (Great Soul), but what you may not know is he was also an absolute idiot. But more on that later.

Possibilities?

Dodo-geria?

Question toBollywood… Is this Paa 2?

Could this be Gandhi?

It was dark.

It was crowded.

The people were anxious. The men in suits were calm.

You stand in front of a night club…any night club, and you are bound to encounter this scenario. It took you the better part of 2 hours to decide whether or not to wear your new Aldo Plimsols, and now you stand waiting in line; surrounded by shitheads, to get into the club. Thoughts race through your head. Is this even worth it? Why not try the one down the street? Is my crotch itchy? Apart from the last one anyway, you’re a bit flustered. The idea of shelling out a big wad of cash for what might be a night of badly brewed alcohol and ‘well endowed’ women would make even the most seasoned player anxious. Then..without warning…there is the Unce.

Yes…the Unce.

You heard it right…Unce.

If you played the video above…you’d know what Unce is, was, and will ever be.

For the more literary minded (including those Shakespeare reading sick-fucks), the term Unce can be defined as follows:

Unce: noun-the beat to nearly all techno, trance and/or house music tracks, most commonly played in night clubs and discotheques

Quite shocking…isnt it?

It Gets You at the Best of Times

It hits you.

You are standing, simply standing, in the queue…to possibly enjoy a cold drink with the boys, possibly stare at mildly attractive females, or get drunk and pass out in a gutter. Whatever the case may be, when it hits you, it hits you hard.

It is sentient. You can feel it through you. It is all consuming.

That repetitive: unce unce unce unce unce

Primal instincts take over. You have to get into the club.

unce unce unce unce unce

You might have to assault, steal or murder your way in…but you will do it.

unce unce unce unce unce

You want to make love to it. You want unce to have your babies.

unce unce unce unce unce

It completes you.

unce unce unce unce unce

It…makes…you…just….want….to…..dance!

Possible Cure?

Maybe…Maybe not…but until then

UNCE UNCE UNCE!